Memorable Jokes

A source of Good humor, Jokes, Funny pictures and giggles and through laughter we can lead the world to health, happiness, and peace.

Thursday, October 23, 2008

Najivunia kuwa Mkenya

Mzungu was touring Kenya with his wife and daughter, and he was rather proud for he thought he had mastered the local language, Swahili.

They got thirsty and flocked to one of the pubs for a drink, having sat, he ordered drinks in Swahili; a waiter brought the drinks as ordered, but failed to pour them onto the glasses.

Furious, the mzungu calls loudly for people to hear that he knows swahili.

He meant to ask the waiter to pour the drinks for the wife first, then the daughter, and finally himself.

"Waiter, kuja hapa. Tabia gani hii? Tia bibi kwanza, Tia mtoto, halafu tia mimi nyuma''.



Tuesday, October 21, 2008

The Wrong Way

As a senior citizen was driving down the freeway, his cell phone rang.

Answering, he heard his wife's voice urgently warning him, "Herman, I just heard on the news that there''s a car going the wrong way on Route 280. Please be careful!"

"It's not just one car," said Herman, "It's hundreds of them!"

Tuesday, October 07, 2008

Biker Bullies

A cheerful truck driver pulled up at a roadside cafe in the middle of the night for a dinner stop. Halfway through his meal, three wild-looking motorcyclists roared up–bearded, leather-jacketed, filthy.

For no reason at all, they selected the truck driver as a target. One poured pepper over his head, another stole his apple pie, the third deliberately tipped his coffee over. The truck driver never said one word, just stood up, paid his check, and left.

“That truck driver sure ain’t much of a fighter,” sneered one of the bikers.

The girl behind the counter, peering out into the night, added, “He doesn’t seem to be much of a truck driver, either. He just ran over three motorcycles.”

Rabbi and Priest

A Rabbi and a Priest buy a car together and it's being stored at the Priest's house. One day the Rabbi goes over to use the car and he sees him sprinkling water on it. The Rabbi asked, ''What are you doing?'' The Priest responded, ''I'm blessing the car.'' So the Rabbi said ''Okay, since we're doing that....'' and takes out a hacksaw and cuts two inches off the tail pipe.