Memorable Jokes

A source of Good humor, Jokes, Funny pictures and giggles and through laughter we can lead the world to health, happiness, and peace.

Thursday, September 11, 2008

Top Ten Dirty Lawyer Sayings

The top ten things that sound dirty in law (but aren't!)
10. Have you looked through her briefs?
9. He is one hard judge!
8. Counselor, let's do it in chambers.
7. Her attorney withdrew at the last
minute.
6. Is it a penal offense?
5. Better leave the handcuffs on.
4. For $200 an hour, she better be
good!
3. Can you get him to drop his suit?
2. The judge gave her the stiffest one
he could.
And the number 1 thing that sounds dirty in law but isn't:
1. Think you can get me off?

Lost Glass Eye

A few days before his proctological exam, a one eyed man accidentally swallowed his glass eye.

He was worried for a while, but there were no ill effects, so he forgot about it.

Once he was in the doctor's office, the man followed instructions, undressed, and bent over. The first thing the proctologist saw when he looked up the man's ass was that eye staring right back at him.

"You know," said the doctor, "you really have to learn to trust me."

Thursday, September 04, 2008

How much can you trust a friend?

Mutua left to go help in the Crusades and decided that his wife Mueni should wear a chastity belt. (Steel underwear) So he locks her up and
gives the key to his best friend, Mogaka. He tells him, “If I'm not back in four years, unlock my wife and set her free to live a normal life."

So, Mutua leaves on horseback and about a half hour later, he sees a cloud of dust behind him. He waits for it to come closer and sees Mogaka.
"What's wrong?" He asks. Mogaka replies.
"You gave me the wrong key!"