Memorable Jokes

The regular Kenya Police, the no-nonsense paramilitary General Service Unit (GSU) & the CID are all trying to prove to the Coalition Government that they are the best at apprehending criminals. President Kibaki and Prime Minister Raila decide to give them a test. They release a rabbit into Karura forest and each of them has to catch it. The CID goes in. They place animal informants throughout the forest. They question all plant and mineral witnesses. After three months of extensive investigations they conclude that rabbits do not exist. The GSU goes in. After two weeks with no leads they burn the forest, killing everything in it, including the rabbit and they make no apologies. The rabbit had it coming. The Kenya police goes in. They come out two hours later with a badly beaten Monkey. The Monkey is yelling, "Okay!! Okay!! I'm a rabbit, I'm a rabbit!"

A woman and a man are involved in a car accident; it’s a bad one. Both of their cars are totally demolished but amazingly neither of them are hurt. After they crawl out of their cars, the woman says, “Wow, just look at our cars! There’s nothing left, but fortunately we are unhurt. This must be a sign from God that we should meet and be friends and live together in peace for the rest of our days.” The man replied, “I agree with you completely. This must be a sign from God!” The woman continued, “And look at this, here’s another miracle. My car is completely demolished but this bottle of wine didn’t break. Surely God wants us to drink this wine and celebrate our good fortune.” Then she hands the bottle to the man. The man nods his head in agreement, opens it, drinks half the bottle, and extends it back to the woman. Politely, the woman refuses to accept the bottle. The man asks, “Aren’t you having any?” The woman replies, “No. I think I’ll just wait for the police…...